The environmental health officer came at ten past four on the afternoon we opened, which is not late, which is exactly when they come, and which did not stop Simon standing in the middle of a hundred and ten covers saying the word now in a tone of voice I had not heard from him before.
“Now is fine,” I said. “Now is better than Thursday. Go and be charming at him and don’t touch anything.”
He went and was charming at him. The officer spent fifty minutes in my kitchen, found two things, wrote them down, told me the probe log was the best he had seen this year, and left at five past five with the certificate in the folder, and I have it framed in the office, which I am aware is the single most tedious thing about me.
Ninety minutes to service.
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Arches thirteen and…
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